Your use of explicit and researched details really hits a home run for me as a reader. When you describe the multiple items that could have been in the dentist's mouth, I thought your incorporation of detail was strong without going completely overboard. Also, you brought a great deal of realism to the story. As a reader, I immediately played this scene out with my younger self out as the main character. (I also felt the same way in regards to the prize box. It was even more annoying when I was thirteen and the assistant was still begging me to take a prize.)
When you finally reach the second toy portion of the story, I began reading this as two different stories coming together. I recommend that you stay with the dentist route and bring in more description about the appointment itself. Did the dentist's breath smell like smoke or was it minty fresh? What did the room look like? Was it typically '90s decorum or was it designed as a poor attempt to relate to younger crowd? I know this is a memory from years ago, but I wanted more focus on the visit itself rather than the toy store that followed.
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